Eight.

“Liam is an ass.” I said getting into the car.

“What? What happened?” Rose asked.

“He kissed me. He has been kissing me for like a week and a half now. Its like he just wants to believe Morgan never happened. That this year never happened.” I said.

“What about Sidney?” She asked.

“Yeah.. what about Sidney? I don’t know. I don’t know what to do. I like Sidney. I like him more than I thought I would. But, Liam is Liam.” I said.

“Liam is an ass, like you said. You can’t just forget the Morgan thing. I mean you were friends with her!” Rose said.

“I know, but I also just can’t forget everything else he has done for me through the years.” I said.

“Grace, what it comes down too.. isn’t what you two had in the past, its not who was there through cancer.. its not even who you love more right now.. its who makes you happier. The question isn’t who do you love? Its who could you love for forever? Who do you want to give your hear t too. And I know you are going to say Liam has your heart. He doesn’t. He gave it back when he slept with Morgan. He doesn’t deserve you. You don’t owe him anything.” She said.

“You should have heard when Sidney said today before we left.”

“Tell me.” She said.

“So I like this girl.. she is great. Actually, she is amazing. When I’m not with her, I want to be. She gives me another reason to love this city. She makes me laugh when no one else can. I drink more coffee than one should ever because of her. I do things I would never do. There is just one problem.. she can’t get over her ex-boyfriend. And it sucks, because I like her and I think we could have something good. But, I just wait. And I would wait for her for a long time, I think. But, I’m not sure if I could ever be her somebody. He said to me before we were about to leave each other.”

“And what did you say?” She asked.

“I said nothing. What do you say to that?”

“He isn’t going to wait forever, Grace. He doesn’t know what you and Liam went through. To him, Liam is just some ex-boyfriend. Sidney doesn’t even understand how hard this is, even if he knew, he may not understand. But, you have to tell him, because you can’t expect him to wait forever.” Rose said. I just looked at her.

“Do you honestly think you are going to be with Liam for forever? You honestly think that if you get back together.. that’s it. Cue ending, buy the white dress, and then there will be a happily ever after?” Rose said.

“I don’t know what I think. Did I use to think I wanted to go through forever with Liam? Yes, no doubt in my mind. I thought life would be amazing just to have him by my side.”

“But now?”

“But now, there is Sidney.”

“and what does that mean?”

“It means that I don’t know if Liam is the only guy that I could ever love.” I said.

“Don’t you think you owe it to yourself and to Sidney to see?” Rose said.

“This is why you are my best friend.” I said smiling.

About an hour into the drive, I got an idea. I thought I would call and leave a message on Sidney’s phone. I knew when the plane was to take off and I know he wouldn’t answer his phone then. I wanted to get his answering machine. I grabbed my phone.

“What are you going to do?” Rose asked.

“I’m going to say something to Sidney.” I said and started dialing his number

“So.. I have this problem. I like this boy. He is kind of a big deal. Well to the world he is, but I am starting to realize he kind of is a big deal to me, not because of this sport he plays, but because of the boy he is. Theres this boy who makes me forget about school and everything else. He makes me smile after a bad test, and actually makes me want to watch some silly sport that he loves so much. There is a boy who I know I am hurting because I am confused, but I want him to know that from time to time he pops into my mind when he has no business being there. I want him to know that I don’t want to make him wait, but I have too because I want to be sure. I am only sure of one thing, I want this boy in my life in some way. Could you pass on the message? Thanks.” I said hanging up the phone.

“Did you speak fast enough?” Rose said laughing.

“I didn’t want to get cut off!” I said.

“That was good, Grace. Real good.” She said.

“Rose.. its like I know that I want to be with Sidney. But also know that I love Liam too. I just never thought when Liam started wanting me, that another guy would too.”

“Well my dear, someone else was bound to find you.” She said laughing.

“Yeah, who would have thought?” I said.

“I can tell that you like Sidney. And I hate Liam for doing this.. I hate him for making you question this.” She said.

“Rose, maybe I am hurting Liam by being with Sidney. Maybe what he said was true? Maybe he really knows he messed up. Maybe its time for me to forgive him.”

“You just need to make a decision and stick to it. Because this little triangle thing you got going on..its pointy and someone is bound to get hurt.” Rose said.

“I know. I know that I have to pick.” I said. Then we kind of just sat in silence. Well, not really silence. We were rocking out to some Taylor Swift.

“Thanks for the message.” Sidney simply said. I called him later that night after I saw my family and whatnot.

“I should have said it before I left. But better late than never.” I said.

“Very true. How is being home?” He asked.

“Its kind of weird. I haven’t seen my parents since spring break or my sisters since winter break so that was nice. But, I kind of think of Pittsburgh as my home now.” I said.

“Yeah, that makes sense. How was the ride?” He asked.

“Fun. Car talks are always the best.” I said laughing.

I was home for a total of 5 days. I had talked to both Liam and Sidney about the same amount. Actually, I probably talked to Sidney more. I watched his games and then he would call me. I was really excited to see him, which kind of surprised me. Well, maybe it didn’t. I don’t know. I think it is safe to say that I am just confused. I was leaving tomorrow, Friday. But before I left, I wanted to have one night with Rose. Just me and her, because usually at school it was me, her, Liam. We both loved the show Dawson’s Creek. We decided to watch the finale because we haven’t seen it in what seems like forever. Of course, I cried. I cry all the time at the ending of that show. Actually, I cry all the time at that show no matter what.

“I figured it out.” Rose said after it ended.

“Figured what out.”

“I think that you should be with Sidney.”

“What?”

“Okay, just listen to me.” Rose said.

“I’m listening.”

“Liam is your Dawson. He was there when you needed someone the most. He was the one that experienced so many things in your life. He is your soul mate. You two are destined to always be a part of each others’ lives. You two will always love eachother. Sidney is your Pacey. He is the guy you long to be with. He is the person you know you should be with, but are too scared to lose your soulmate over him. Sidney is your Pacey. And you know who Joey ends up with in the long run..” Rose said.

“Pacey.” I said.

“Exactly.”

“So you think I should be with Sidney?”

“I think that you should do whatever you want. But, don’t think just because one person may be your soul mate.. that doesn’t mean they are the love of your life.” Rose said.

“What am I going to do without you this summer?!” I said hugging her.

“I guess I will just have to visit a lot!” She said laughing.

“Yeah, and you know we will be on the phone all the time.” I said.

“Of course.” She said.

“Okay, well thanks for everything. I love you.” I said hugging her. Then she left. And I was left alone with my thoughts.

I have to tell you something.

I read that text message and was confused. What could Sidney really need to tell me at 2 in the morning?

I’ll call you tomorrow while I’m driving back. I want to sleep so I can leave early in the morning.

Okay, sweet dreams : )

Night, Sid.