Thirteen.

“I’m going to the coffee shop to see if I can get a job this summer.” I said to Liam.

“You are getting a job?” He asked surprised.

“Yeah, why not?”

“Because you don’t need the money and you are taking classes and volunteering.”

“I’m not going to work all the time. Just a few days a week.” I said.

“Did you tell your boyfriend?” He asked.

“Sidney is not my boyfriend. At all.” I said.

“He stayed here last night.” He said.

“Yeah, because I was scared. He left like at 7 am.” I explained.

“So you two aren’t dating?” He asked.

“No, definitely not dating.” I said.

“But you want too.” He said.

“I’m leaving.” I said and walked out the door.

I didn’t know what I wanted from Sidney. I knew I liked him and only him. But did I really want to be dating Sidney Crosby? I soon realized I definitely did want to be dating him, but he maybe wasn’t so sure if he wanted to be dating me.

Sidney and I have been really good lately. We have hung out and spent a lot of time together. Well, I mean he is busy with playoffs and what not but we make time. I have to admit, I love kissing him. There is just something about it, it gets me everytime. But, we never put a label on what we were to each other. I never really needed us too, but with the day looming that he will leave to go back home, it seems like it needs to happen.

Right After Philly Series.

“Where is Liam?” Sidney asked. We were entwined on the couch.

“Home. I told you I was staying here by myself, this summer.” I said.

“Doesn’t it get lonely?” He asked.

“I guess. Its not like Liam is that far away. I can call him whenever I want him.” I said.

I put my hand right to his, as if I was measuring the size of our hands. Then I let our fingers enterwined. Then I kissed his fingers, and asked the question.

“Sidney, what are we?” I asked him.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean, are we friends?” I asked.

“That’s a stupid question. Of course we are friends.”

“Are we more than friends?”

“Well I would hope you don’t kiss all your friends the way you kiss me.” He said laughing.

“I’m serious. I don’t care what we are, I just want to know.”

“You don’t care?”

“I care, but you won’t hurt me if you say the wrong thing.” I explained.

“I like you..” He said.

“Bad timing though. I mean you don’t need to be worrying about this relationship right now. Plus, you leave soon.” I said.

“So what are you saying?”

“I’m saying that I like you. But, just because of everything I went through, that doesn’t mean this has to be serious.” I said.

“Its not about you being sick.” He said.

“I know, its not. I’m just saying.. I do like you. But, you are crazy busy. I don’t expect you to be worrying about me.”

“I want to worry about you. Anyways, regardless if you are my “girlfriend” I will still worry about you.”

“Thats sweet.” I said.

“It’s the truth.”

“But when you leave, what happens?” I asked.

“What do you want to happen?”

“I don’t want to be worrying that you are dating other people. I don’t want to be thinking that you are cheating on me.”

“You really think I would cheat on you?”

“I don’t think so, but I don’t know.”

“Why don’t you just tell me what you want to say.”

“I don’t want to date other people, but you should be able too. I don’t want you too, but its probably best.”

“So what are you saying?”

“I’m saying you are off the hook. Would I be upset to see you with another girl? Yes. But should you be with anyone during the Stanley Cup Finals? No.”

“I want to be with you.” He said.

“Me too, but what happens when you are back home and I’m still here?” I asked.

“We will figure it out.”

“I just don’t think we should be that serious.” I said.

“I agree that I don’t want to be serious during the Finals. But afterwards, I want to be with you.” He said.

“Afterwards, you will be leaving for three months.” I said.

“Distance doesn’t mean I will forget you or that my feelings will change.” He said.

“We will see.” I said.

“Grace.. I’m here. Do I need to focus in the next few weeks? Yeah. But, I’m here because I want to be.” He said kissing me.

“I just don’t want you to be trapped.” I said.

“I’m not trapped. I like you.” He said touching my face.

“So do you want me to stay tonight or are you okay?” He asked.

“You can do whatever you want.” I said.

“Grace..”

“Of course I want you to stay because I feel safer when you are next to me. But, I’m okay if you want to leave.”

“If you want me here, I’m here.” He said.

“I don’t like being this helpless girl.” I said when we were lying in bed together.

“You aren’t.”

“That’s how you see me.” I said.

“I don’t see you that way, Grace. You put words in my mouth. You think I don’t want to be with you, but yet I’m laying right next to you, holding you in my arms.” He said.

“Its funny that you were in Pittsburgh when I was here for treatment.” I whispered.

“I wish I knew you back then.” He said.

“I’m glad you didn’t.” I whispered, not sure if he heard me.